That fork gives me anxiety.
The hammer looks like from a stupid commercial:
Today on ‘Daily Life’ : How to make your ow Mjolmir
a plus-side to being my friend is that you can come to my house in your pajamas and i will not judge you because i will also be in my pajamas
do you ever have the urge to tell someone to shut the fuck up even when they aren’t talking
calm your shit barbie not everyone has white privilege like you do
What if prisons let prisoners take their own mug shots?
fuck education who wants to start a band
your URL makes me suspicious of your intentions with this band.
Virginity only matters if you’re lighting the black flame candle to summon witches.
Actually, When people talk about “blood of a virgin”, what’s actually meant is “virgin blood”, aka blood that’s never before been used in a ritual.
Therefore, virginity doesn’t matter for anything.
*noises of comprehension and frustration that I didn’t make that connection before*
when they say simpons did it already
they’re not fucking kidding
A guy is taking his girlfriend to prom. He waits in the ticket line for a really long time but gets them. He goes to rent a limo. The rental line is really long but he eventually does it. He goes to buy her flowers. The line at the florist is really long but eventually he gets the flowers. At prom, she asks him to go get punch. He goes to the refreshment table and there’s no punchline.
you’ve got to be kidding me
I am in physical pain
If you can’t deal with my sarcasm. I can’t deal with being your friend.
my life is one big “wow ok”